Hey Dr Sue —I Am A Woman In My Early 60's And Intercourse Has Just Become Too Painful.

Hi Wincing!

I’m sorry you’re experiencing this, but I’m glad you reached out. I’m guessing you’re not the only woman in their 60s, 70s, 80s and beyond who’s struggling with this.

The first thing I just want to point out is that a normal thing that happens as women age and go through menopause is that the vaginal tissue is going to become less elastic, and your vagina is not going to lubricate as much as it used to. This is one of the reasons why pain during intercourse is one of the most commonly reported sexual concerns for women as they age.

There are some easy ways to try and address this. The first is vaginal lube, which you can buy at many stores in person or online if you prefer. Be careful with this though, because you want to check the pH of the lube. The pH of a lube isn’t something we usually talk about, although we should because it can have a big impact on your vaginal health.

The pH of the vagina is about 3.8 to 4.5. But after menopause it goes up a bit. So definitely try to find a lube that’s going to fall into the right pH level for you. I’m not necessarily recommending a specific one, but some of the KY Jelly products and some of the Astroglide products fall into the right pH range.