Hey Dr Sue — Do You Believe Chivalry Is Still Applicable? Or Is It Sexist?

What a great question to start the new year!

Let me clear that unlike most of my posts, this one is based solely on my opinion.

I’m going to skip the deep historical dive into the origins of the concept of chivalry, and instead talk about some of my experiences with it in the 21st century.

My issues with the concept of chivalry stem from the fact that there is sometimes an element of power tied into chivalry. While some might say that being chivalrous is a sign of respect, I have learned from recent experiences that even if it is rooted in respect, that that respect might be superficial.

Let me explain. I recently lived in a Southern state, one that is deeply rooted in tradition. I also found it to be stifling, as there was this adherence to outdated gender roles for most of the people that I interacted with. It would be fair to say that I had a little bit of culture shock when I moved there.

There was one specific incident that made me realize just how superficial the concept of chivalry can be for some people.

I was walking towards a door and a man was in front of me. He went to hold the door open and I said “no, thank you.”